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Other essays on this theme
Essay: "Fresh Air"by Rene De La Rosa Okay, picture it. For two years you've been able to move only four steps in one direction, two and a half steps in another. For two years your only view of the outside of your cell is a four foot long, four inch wide window at the top of your cell. Everything you do is restricted and the only place you go without handcuffs is Â'memory lane.' Your air is stale, your conversation is dead, your thoughts sometimes become distorted, your patience tested. Your environment is contained in every sense of the word.
That's two years in Ad. Seg. Now picture this, for six years you've been in one place. You try to remember the feel of your last trip in any vehicle. You long to be a passenger. You long to go somewhere, anywhere physically. You're tired of the mental safari trips. You pray while you sit in that cell for two years, on the same unit for six years "please let me out, I've learned my lesson." Just one more, "fresh air." Then it happened. Your prayer answered. "Pack up your chain!" Your heart starts racing, your limbs shaking. You try to play it down as no big deal, but it's in your voice as clear as a symbol crash in church. Sit, breathe, breathe?? You realize within the next week you will be free. Walking without handcuffs, see the sky. Breathe fresh air!! You realize you've been given another chance. You don't want to ever come back, to Ad. Seg. "Fresh air." Let me tell you about "fresh air." It's sweet and tastes like honey. It's a warm summer sun after a cool shower. "Fresh air" after Ad. Seg? It's like watching your baby smile at you for the first time. It's like seeing again. "Fresh air" after Ad. Seg? It's frightening. It's like playing Russian Roulette. A game of chance. It's like walking on a tightrope without a safety line over an endless gorge. Your misstep will send you to the bottom again. "Fresh air" after Ad. Seg? It's a narcotic at first; you indulge in the feeling, knowing soon it will eventually wear off. This is how I'm feeling now because I've been given my first dose of "fresh air." I took my first ride in six years. I saw trees and horses, a McDonalds and even a liquor store. I felt the road underneath me. Man it was great!! But "fresh air" after Ad. Seg. also has me melancholy. I saw and lived in the world of the "confined," amongst the so-called "menaces to prison." I've heard their stories, and seen it through their eyes. For a lot of those cats their first taste of "fresh air" will be their last breath in Ad. Seg, because they can never leave. I left behind some good friends knowing this. "Fresh air" after Ad. Seg. makes me realize I'm blessed with another chance. "Fresh air" after Ad. Seg, for a person with 2 life sentences? Believe it or not it tastes like "freedom!!!" This is my view on Fresh Air. |