PRISONER EXPRESS

In our society labeling a person an intellectual is saying he or she is a thinking person. Thinking allows a person to absorb ideas. Sound, positive ideas give a person the ability to think their way out of a bad situation. If we look at our situation as being a bad situation, that's good judgment. Doing nothing about it is bad judgment that will cause the situation to worsen.

Being confined and not embracing the idea of positive thinking we will never be at peace with ourselves. All the negative aspects of our lives before incarceration will continue to control our lives.

We will not have the freedom we need, so we tend to act the way we did prior to incarceration. We don't want to hear the truth; we continue to deeper imprison our minds by rebelling against all norms of prison environment.

It's not a waste of time being incarcerated. Being incarcerated and not doing anything positive is not only a waste of times, it's a waste of your mind. Some of us think it's ignorance that causes a person not to take advantage of any educational or self-help programs while incarcerated, while others think they are self made intellectuals because they have a desired job in the institution, rely on the news to keep them informed of current events, exercise and participate in sports, become an avid reader of newspapers and magazines (this list can go on and on).

I grew up in this 1960s when teaching methods probably were different. Before the end of every school day one or more of our teachers would stress how important it is just to get a high school diploma. They would use the word ignorant many times. They used to say to use, that's another word for dumb-bell. As I started getting older I found out that ignorant simply means lacking in knowledge or training- or unlearned.

According to statistics African Americans of the 1960s are academically more educated. We did not rebel or ignored parental advice. More so, peer pressure was not as misleading as it is today due to lack of knowledge.

Many of us here at EHCC give many excuses as to why we are incarcerated. The weakest excuse I hear most is when a younger inmate gets upset when an older inmate attempts to give him advice on how to stay out once they are released. Usually these types of conversations get loud and boisterous. If it gets hostile younger inmates outburst never change - YOU CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING YOU ARE OLDER THAN I AM AND YOU ARE IN HERE IN WITH ME. That's only a cop out slang. I relate those types of conversations to a song lyric by singer/composer Isaac Hayes, "We are just one big unhappy family we are to proud to let our feelings show."

Comparing our lifestyles and materialistic accomplishments to those of correctional and administrative personnel is not facing reality. Whatever options we have concerning institutional policies and conduct of correctional officers is meaningless. The precious time we spend criticizing the system could be put to better use learning how the system works and how to legally address our dislikes.

There has been a former inmate that has left the penal system and never returned. These individuals became ladders in their communities. Probably not forgotten, but their old ways were left behind prison walls. In my community there is a minister I spend a lot of time with. Many times he told me when he was incarcerated guys asked him things because he had a college education. He said he always told them what they wanted to hear and most times the answer did not pertain to scriptures. Once I listen to an unpublished speech by the late Malcolm X. Over thirty years ago this one statement from this speech stayed on my mind, "The most dangerous thing in the world is trying to correct a fool."

My overhaul concept of being incarcerated is that it should cause a change in our lives. That change comes from within. A thinking person becomes aware that it's time to face reality. When a positive mind power increases new ideas are born. An individual can transform into a leader. A recent quote from, Newsweek, May 16, 2005 article entitled, "Designing The Future", stated, "Problems can't be solved by the same consciousness that created them." That's the type of statement that a thinking person finds challenging increases his mental perception.

Most of us don't want to admit we need a wake-up call, get our priorities in order, apply ourselves towards being a better human being, and realize our services are no longer needed in communities where our families are located. Many things are hard for us to admit. It's only another way of not being honest with ourselves. Looking back in the 1970's after leaving the military I never closed my doors to the Jehovah witness brothers and sisters. One scripture they use to recite is still part of my daily struggle, "to the making of books there is no ending." I may have adopted my own interpretation of that scripture, but by focusing on it I began going to one school after another.

I am a repeat offender. At the age I am now I may not live out this sentence. I did not waste my time during previous incarcerations. I accomplished some college credits plus three vo-tech skills. Those alone were enough for me to earn a profitable honest living. Instead I always wanted to beat the odds. While living comfortable I fell in love with making fast money with narcotics. I enjoyed the pomp and glitter world a long time. Well, I do not have to tell you the rest. I have been here for two years.

At one church service I attended while in HRDC two years ago Elder Willie Williams delivered a message that's still fresh in my mind. It was more than the message that has been a driving force for me, even the title of the message inspired me - "Monkey see monkey do."

A person doesn't have to become a leader in other people's eyes. Seeking academic knowledge increases your mind power. It's an awesome feeling to achieve a certified skill, land a good paying job, establish good credit, and then buy a home for your family. That's the mark of a real leader.