PRISONER EXPRESS

Merriam Webster defines gratitude with one wordÂ...thankfulness. It is a noun presumably, something that is treated as an object, a thing, something tangible, notable, visual. Roget's Super Thesaurus lists seven words that are interchangeable with gratitude. They are appreciation, thankfulness, gratefulness, thanks, acknowledgment, recognition, and sense of obligation.

Shakespeare states: "The exchequer of the poor." Exchequer is defined as treasury, especially as national treasury.

Now, up until the Shakespeare analogy, gratitude is something pretty simple to understand, right? But is it really? The word gets obscure with Roget's synonyms. Since I have recently begun to climb a new mountain, gratitude is one of the many hand holds I desire to have in my pack of climbing gear. Gratitude Â-- thankfulness, gratefulness, appreciation, thanks, okay I understand these terms. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful or grateful. But wait, the "ness" suffix denotes a state of being. So being thankful for waking up everyday is not total gratitude to the power-that-be who created me. I must be in a state of thankfulness to have gratitude for God. So, gratitude is not something we just show, it is an attitude of continually being.

Next, Roget's claims gratitude as acknowledgment or recognition. Okay, so I acknowledge the gift of each day, to rise, to breathe, to see the sun rise, bird's singing, feeding and flying. It is a gift this day to which I have a God who deserves the recognition.

Finally, Roget's says it's a sense of obligation. We are not only recognizing the gift of the day, but we have a sense of obligation to give credit where it is due, to He who gave us the day.

The wise Dr. Judith Orloff states: "Gratitude reflects respect for others." (Positive Energy pg. 275) Herein lies the secret to gratitude. We show our respect to others through our thankfulness. In these close quarters where it is exceedingly hard to find anything respectable of others, I have gratitude in knowing that this trial will pass soon and the negative energy of this place will cease to be a factor in my daily life. To respect another's person is not wholly impossible if that individual knows what respect is and strives to earn it. This is the crux of inmates, few have respect for anything, including themselves.

Herein lies a positive facet I possess that I new recognize as a social benefit. I, no matter what, try to show respect to all, even to those who don't deserve it. I am suddenly filled with gratitude toward God for another gift that so few possess.

Daily, I am thankful for all the good things that come my way. I am also thankful for all the trials and tribulations that I suffer. Robert Schuller stated: "If you have no adversity Â-- you better get on your knees and ask God to send you some" (Paraphrase) As long as I am being tried by the fires of life, I know God hasn't given up on me. I am thankful for being a "work in progress". I never stop being thankful, pondering often the situation that I am in. I'm not happy to be here, but given the alternative of this life and the after life, I am always in a state of being thankful, this is gratitude.

Not a day goes that I don't give recognition to some very cold truths that are blessings to me. Millions of people, many children, will go hungry today, tomorrow, all week and maybe until they die. I'm currently on lockdown, which means we get fed one boiled egg, milk, and a peanut butter sandwich in the mornings. Our other two meals are a selected dry meat sandwich and another peanut butter sandwich. One day of these meals would go miles in time to a family in an impoverished third world country. I want to complain, but I have to stop and be thankful and I have to have gratitude toward God for allowing me to live in a country where I don't go hungry, not even in prison.

I also have a roof over my head, clothes and shoes. My low standard of living rivals a millionaire's when compared to some places. All of this can be overwhelming when we choose to be grateful, to have sincere gratitude toward the God who created us. I may not have any food in my locker. I may not get mail. I may not have one friend left in this world. But still I am filled with gratitude toward God for not abandoning me.

Gratitude means a lot of things. But, we must note one thing, it is a noun, a subject, an object, tangible, visual, touchable, feelable. We receive it in little things that enlighten us to the Divine scheme and Design.