PRISONER EXPRESS

Right now parole is one of the most difficult subjects for me to write about. I was denied parole for my 4th time and am having a hard time accepting that fact this time.

It's been my experience, down here in Texas, that when we, as offenders, go to court and plea bargain, the length of time when we are up for parole is often factored into the sentence that we eventually receive. I was present with my attorney and district attorney on the day my plea bargain was decided. At this time, because of previous drug charges the district attorney wouldn't go any lower that a 15-year sentence. He based this on the fact that I would be up for parole after a year and a half. Because this was not my first time, I was told I would probably not make my first parole, but as long as I was good, I should make my next parole. I tried to argue but to no success. After all, these were people who knew the law. I can still remember the very last thing I was told. That was that "I would probably be out in 3 years, but no more than 5 at the longest." There it is 7 years later and I still don't know when I'll be released.

Am I bitter? I try so hard not to be, but have to admit to my wrong doing and say yes, I did deserve to go to jail. But, when is enough enough? I am a non-violent person with multiple drug charges. I am 40 years old now and I feel that aging, not being in prison has changed my thinking. I wonder, is being denied parole time after time will start to have negative effects on my attitude.

I feel the parole system in Texas is abused by those who are in a position to grant it. Very rarely do we, offenders, meet with any who are voting on our cases. So, who decides our futures? Who decides whether or not we make parole and when? Is it the lawyers and the district attorneys when they are pleading our cases and factoring in our parole date? Or is it the parole board who doesn't take the time to get to know us?