PRISONER EXPRESS

When I first saw parole as a theme topic I immediately discounted it as an essay subject for me. Since I am on death row, parole is in no way a consideration. But the more I thought about it the more it seemed viable. Reality is rarely potent enough to dispel dreams. Parole is not a legal option for me, but its equivalent--release from prison some other way--still remains intensely desirable.

I have met several people that have experienced parole and returned. I am always curious as to what went wrong. My hope is to learn what mistakes occurred, and given the chance at freedom I may avoid them myself. The word parole is etymologically traced to a Late Latin term, parabola, meaning speech. When a person is paroled they give their word, a promise, conversely a speech, that they will follow stated rules in order to leave prison. A man's word, a.k.a. 'speech', is usually the last thing someone, prison for this example, can take from him. This in turn becomes a sense of pride for a man to make his word mean something, not only to himself but before others as well. "Mean what you say, say what you mean." Sadly for some, once released, their 'speech' appears to become static hence the recidivism.

For me the only real option is to leave death row for a new trial and hopefully move on to the free world from there. Whatever the route, mentally, I have fast-forwarded through these steps to dream about what I would do given the opportunity. I want to do something with my hands. I want to go to school and learn not one trade but several and go to work building, constructing, and devising something, anything. All these years of idleness have caused a jumpy eagerness to do something. Once some semblance of financial stability has occurred I want to move on to traveling. I have to see the world. An 8'x10' cell shrink wraps your world and traveling for me is going to open the world up like a spring blossom

I hope that each person can look at parole as a new chance at life and actually make it happen. In my case I hope that freedom can be a new beginning and that I can rise above these prison ruins or ashes like the mythical phoenix.