Other essays on this theme

Essay: "Love"

by Lewis Martin
Love... a small word for such a complex emotion. There is no single explanation for it, because love is made up of many things. It cannot be measured, because it is a feeling. All the money in the world cannot buy love; it has to be earned. It does not happen by wishing; it must come about mutually. Love is not an instantaneous emotion, but something that grows slowly between two people, maturing with time. Once love has reached maturity, there is no stronger bond between two people. But when the two people are separated like a lot of us in prison are from a loved one, this love sometimes becomes weak. And those of us in prison struggle to strengthen this love once again.

To love someone means being comfortable and at ease with them, sharing confidence knowing that they will be understood and held in trust. It means respecting each other's dignity and never being demanding, but rather being willing to give, and accepting that which is given, graciously and with love.

To love someone means having a genuine concern for them, being able to sense that something is wrong without being told. It is understanding the other person's problems, moods, and 'hang-ups,' and accepting all of them even if you don't quite understand. It is excusing their faults, because you know that their good points far outweigh the bad. A lot of us in prison don't seem to realize this until we are locked up and then sometimes it is too late.

Love is always being there for each other with a shoulder to cry on, to give support when confidence levels are low, to give helpful advice when it is asked for, to know when to be silent and just listen, or to have cheerful words of encouragement given. There are a lot of us in prison, especially Ad. Seg., who ask this of our loved ones.

Love is sharing the good and the bad, the hopes and the dreams, the amusing times and the serious times. It is doing things together, yet leaving room for each to grow as an individual.

How do I know these things about love? Because this is the kind of love I had once given to me and didn't realize the love at that time, instead I abused it. Now after nearly 10 years of prison in Texas I've had nothing to do except think about what love is all about. So this is my conclusion I've come too, especially after three marriages that I destroyed due to the lack of love from me. So now if any of my ex-wives read this, and for my family, this is the kind of love I feel for you.

I'm blessed with your love, and I will never take it for granted ever again. I will strive to become an even better person and to always be deserving of your love as I once was, because I truly love you as I have never loved before. For those of us in prison who feel this way, We love you Baby!