The journal of David Moore

Table of Contents:

Sun 2/22

Bipolar Mornings

Sitting here I the day room on a Sunday morning. They said that everybody but SSI's have to stay in their bunk. This is the first time that's even been done since I've been here. It's kind of nice, actually. A lot quieter than normal.

Wrote to Holly, my ex-wife last week. Told her about my prostate cancer diagnosis. The doctor gave me 5 years to live on September 16th of last year. Of course, I hope he's wrong. Don't know how she's going to react. Maybe she went out and celebrated, for all I know. Suggested to her that she not tell our 10 year old daughter. Hope she took the advice. 4 years ago when I told them that I have the symptoms of prostate cancer, all they gave me was Doxasozin. It helped, but it was too little too late. Oh well, I don't really have anything to look forward to, anyway. Not feeling sorry for myself, its reality.

Tore up my brother Lynn's letter today. He wrote back in September, a little more than a month after Dad killed himself. Thought it was strange that he still called Dad, Dean, like he was a stepfather or something. It's ironic that Lynn only writes once a year, yet at his church, he's on the welcoming committee. He's also in 2 Bible studies. He is the very definition of a self-absorbed subordinate. He doesn't have time to visit or write letters to me, but everyone in his self-absorbed world thinks he's a good guy.

Then there's my sister Trish when Mom died in 2003 everything changed. She left each of us $50,000 and everyone but me got their money. It would have helped that she could have loaned me $495 back in 2004 to keep my car from being re-possessed. However, she didn't see it that way. I remember when I told my sister-in-law about it, she said, "where's the love?" Where, indeed. Trish hasn't sent me any money since October of 2007. I've been doing without deodorant and toothpaste since then. This is not a place you don't want to have any personal hygiene items. It starts fights, and worse. In her last letter she said she sent my wife $1,300 which was the interest accrued in the account "for that quarter." I don't see how she lives with herself- she is yet another example of a self-absorbed suburban housewife. Must be nice to live in a 4,000 square foot home. She won't even send me my money for a halfway house. I've had a F1-1 for 15 months now and all I need is an acceptance letter. Since I'm MHMR, they charge money to get into the halfway house. It wouldn't even affect the interest on the account. All I need is $300-400. Is that asking too much? I don't think so.

Sun 3/1

Had a good day today. Writing this about 6:00 p.m. week and a half ago I got some good news. It was an acceptance letter from a halfway house. It's close to home, too. Wrote the parole counselor here and she said that it's still "under investigation." That means that I wont find anything out for sure until another week or two. Meanwhile, I went on pins and needles. I have received 2 letters from halfway houses, only to have it not approved by the local parole office, who has the final say so.

I'm reading "The Charm School" by Nelson De Mille. I really like the writer, but she needs an editor. A lot of his books are about 100 pages too long. Saw "Matchstick Men" with Nicholas Cage this morning. Hadn't seen it before. A bittersweet story of a man who has to make a choice between being a lifetime con artist and his daughter. I cant understand the appeal of Nascar. It's on right now as I write this. How do you root for a certain driver? Who has the most teeth? What about the announcers? There's another left turn, and they are still going really, really fast. Yaww!


We've been on lockdown since last Thursday the 23rd. I wish they would have waited one more week. Missed watching the NFL draft this past weekend. Did listen on Saturday on ESPN radio for the first two rounds. However, on Sunday very little coverage of the draft like I had hoped for. Will have to check the Amarillo paper to get updates, especially who the Cowboys picked.

We went to the gym today for shakedown of our property. Glad to get that over with.

I didn't think I would still be here, if anyone is wondering why I haven't written. I keep sending an I-60 to parole and she ways that my parole plan is still approved. Don't know what the holdup is. I'm getting very antsy.