PRISONER EXPRESS

I suppose I could use a bit of "fresh air," not in its metaphorical sense, but in its literal meaning. Here in this Texas Ad. Seg. it smells like deep-fried gorilla ass cheeks. And Saudi-Arabian desert-dwelling, camel nutsacks. So yes, a good dose of fresh air would be most revitalizing to my senses, all six of them.

Not just a walk out on the rec. yard, but something further, because this facility seems to have its own atmosphere, breathing off its own filth and infecting the lungs of its inhabitants, so that when one of us burps, farts or even breathes out, it just so happens to be the next mans lunch...

"Drop one, drown one!"

"Man put some water on that!"

"God damned bossman, did you have a shitburger for breakfast this morning?"

"Hey, I think you just spit a turd out your mouth!"

"Who ever lived in this cell before was a filthy fuckin pig!"

Yeah, so I'm thinking about an Atlantic coastal retreat where if your ass stinks, I surely wouldn't know it, where I could walk around and absorb all the pleasant smells of nature. The rush of the ocean waves, the trees that grant us the privilege to breathe their life giving essence, or the restaurants that ceaselessly burn with their hypnotic lure of food, or a walk through the mall with the smell of all the hot women's perfumes. With so many different kinds, I'd be in a trance. Or just a simple walk through the neighborhood. Someone cutting the yard, the smell of freshly cut grass. Someone working on their car, the smell of oil and gasoline. Someone building a wood deck in their backyard, the smell of cut wood. Someone Bar-B-Qing, the smell of charcoal and cooking meat. Someone "spring" cleaning their entire house, the smell of pine-sol and other cleaning supplies. Someone......

"Offender Hooper, you need to take the towel off your door so I can see you."

"I will as soon as I get done, bossman."

"It needs to come down now."

"I'm on the shitter, bossman."

"You're what?!"

"I'm dropping your lunch!!"

Postscript:

I'm sorry, I must have wandered off too far in a daydream. But so you know here in Ad. Seg. when you have to take a shit you put a towel over your cell door to cover the screen on your door. This is done for your own privacy and out of respect for those who may be walking by your cell, so that they don't have to see you "on the harley," or smell you. Yet some officers insist on smelling another man's shit. As they say, "like attracts like."